Teresa’s Note: Karen Fritzemeier, a homeschool mom of two, began her healthy journey five months ago with her bold declaration that she wanted to lose 200 pounds. She’s finding it’s not easy, but she’s not giving up. She’s learning more about herself and the why behind eating.
By Karen Fritzemeier
Don’t give up on me people! I’m not giving up on myself. That’s because God has hold of me and He won’t let me go.
The healthy decisions I have made the past several months are reaping dividends, but still I ask myself, “Why can’t I stop eating? Why do I always run to food for comfort?”
Swimming at my local YMCA three times a week means that I am moving around better again. I have more energy. I went from a six to seven arthritis pain level down to two to three.
Drinking more water has also given many benefits. I feel better and can think more clearly. Keeping hydrated has improved my over-all sense of well-being.
This past spring, I thought I wouldn’t be able to attend our weekly homeschool co-op because I was feeling so awful. I told them I wanted my children to attend, but I didn’t think I would be able to be at the meetings this fall. Amazingly, God has given me the strength and energy to attend every week.
Finding the right medication to treat my inflammatory arthritis, combined with swimming and drinking more water has really boosted my health. Staying away from sugar helps keep my thinking clear. My jeans I was wearing this past spring are definitely more loose. I plan to buy the next size down very soon.
Overeating to Relieve Stress
However, the weight is not coming off! I’ve lost 10 pounds and I’m stuck. It. Will. Not. Move. It’s downright embarrassing to me that I can’t come here and post a more successful update. There are some reasons the weight isn’t coming off and I do know why. I’m eating too much.
For some time, I’ve stubbornly avoided food tracking. After keeping tabs for a few days, I see why it is necessary. The truth is, even though I’m eating healthy food, tracking revealed that I’m eating too much of it.
I’m still running to food to try and relieve emotional stress. I’m still making lousy excuses (in my own head) to justify my overeating. I’ve wanted that not to be the case, but it still is. Still God is not leaving me there. I’m not quitting and not giving up because He has never given up on me.
How God Sees Me
He doesn’t see me as a failure. He sees me through His Son, Jesus Christ. I am His beloved. He will not leave me stuck in this sin. He continues to convict me. He keeps saying, “Come to Me, all who are weary and heavy-laden, and I will give you rest.Take My yoke upon you and learn from Me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For My yoke is easy and My burden is light.”1
I have to cut back on food again and I don’t like it. Not one bit. I feel a little bit like a toddler having a temper tantrum saying, “Mine!” The reality is weight won’t come off unless I cut back.
How and Why
I am asking myself the hard question: Why am I hungry?
Being off of sugar is a good thing. Drinking more water is wonderful for me. Swimming is helping my life overall tremendously. However, I’m still running to food for security, comfort and out of bad habits. I admitted this to my Sweet Change group just the other day and now I’m admitting it to everyone who reads this blog. I’m glad Teresa reminded me not to feed the shame monster.
This week I began to understand a bit more of the root causes of why I run to food. Part of it has to do with perceptions I have had since childhood. I renounced the lie that food is a substitute for true love and comfort which only comes from God. Then I asked God, “What is Your truth?”
I sensed He said to me, “Karen, I love you. I gave my Son for you. You are rejecting my love. You are still trying to make it on your own, just you and food. You and food can’t make a go. You and food are trying to stop the abundant life I have planned for you. Forsake the food. Embrace Me and My Son and live!”
I know this is just the beginning. I have more work to do, but I am starting to understand a little more of the whys and the hows of this journey.
Please pray for me as I continue to walk in obedience. Pray for me to stop running to food and to start feeding more and more on the grace of Christ as I surrender this addiction to Him.
Karen Fritzemeier is a homeschooling mom to two children. She and Dean have been married for nine years and live in Michigan. For other posts by Karen, go here. She blogs at http://blueandgreentogether.com/.
Join Karen and others in Sweet Change Weight Loss Group as we explore root causes of food addictions and how God wants to show His people the path to freedom. Join today for our lowest price for only a two months’ commitment. This special offer is available for short time only. Give yourself the gift of health for the holidays. Information and sign up available HERE.
1 Matthew 11:28-30