For some reason when the weather turns nicer, thoughts turn to relationship progression, possibly marriage and living happily forever after.
Sadly, not all relationships end up in the happy ever after category. Mine has survived nearly 37 years mostly due to the fact that I chose a great spouse even though I had little idea what I was doing way back then.
I only knew he was the only man I ever wanted to spend the rest of my life with. He has loved me through thick and thin.
It would be a good idea to ask each other some important questions before you spend the rest of your life with this person you feel you can’t stand to be without for one more minute. What I’m saying is take this short test when you are not sitting so close you can’t wedge a piece of paper between you.
I had been saving this post for my anniversary, but oh well, why not share it now?
Here are 12 Questions to Ask Before Saying, “I Do.” Rate each one 1-10 with 10 being the highest. The 13th question ranks more. Wait for it! Do this test separately and then share your answers.
1. Does our relationship bring glory to God?
2. Can we do more for God together than you can apart?
3. Do you build each other up in your faith?
4. Does your partner know and support the dreams God has placed in your heart?
5. Does your partner encourage you to be all you can be and more than what you could be on your own?
6. Do you see how you could have a ministry together?
7. Do you agree on what type of church or minister you would like to be a part of together and to what extent you would each like to be involved?
8. Do you agree on how you would handle finances, tithing and giving?
9. Do you agree on if you will have children or not, when you would like to have them, whether or not you would ever adopt? Do you agree on basic parenting styles? Do you agree on how you will live out your faith in front of your children?
10. Do you know what kind of rules or boundaries you might have in your relationship, in your finances, in your home, in your free time?
11. Do you agree on various issues or can you live with his or her stance? Here are some to consider: gambling, drinking alcohol, using drugs and prescription medications, watching X rated moves, internet or other types of pornography, smoking, divorce, anger, raised voices, dealing with conflict, dealing with apathy.
12. Do you know your partner’s expectations for you as a spouse? Does he or she know yours?
Spend time talking through each point. Make sure you understand your partner’s thoughts and plans on each of these topics. Determine if the answers are what you expected or not.
If there are some major discrepancies and you still feel your partner is the love of your life, it would be wise to get some relationship counseling or at least come to some mutual agreements before moving the relationship forward.
However if you both scored 120, it might be time to take that next big step.
Final question, though, is the most important one. This one rates 120 all by itself.
13. Does God give His blessing, approval and nod to marriage? Does He agree that this is the person you should marry?
Now, you should have your answer. So, what’s it gonna be?
Teresa Shields Parker is a wife, mother, business owner, life group leader, speaker and author of Sweet Grace: How I Lost 250 Pounds and Stopped Trying to Earn God’s Favor and Sweet Grace Study Guide: Practical Steps to Lose Weight and Overcome Sugar Addiction. Get a free chapter of her memoir on her blog at Teresa Shields Parker.com. Connect with her there or on her Facebook page.